What to Expect When People Are Expecting Your Wedding: Confronting Tradition
Ridiculous Myths and “Traditions” That Make You Question Too Much.
By Super Meredith
Remember when you were a kid and you would avoid stepping on cracks in the sidewalk at all costs because you were sure if you accidentally did, you’d somehow manage to break your grandma’s back in that same moment? Phew, good thing you grew up and realized that’s JUST NOT TRUE.
Of course in the meantime, you wound up subconsciously picking up all sorts of “adult” mumbo-jumbo to believe in, and now you’re planning your wedding around certain matters that may be creating more complications for you than excitement and you’re not even sure why. Don’t worry, here’s a virtual glass of cold water to the face for you – take it with a grain of salt or a big sigh of relief.
It’s best to start your ceremony on the “upswing” of the clock (4:30pm vs. 4pm or 5pm) for good luck and in order to start your marriage on the “upswing.”
God forbid you don’t follow this rule, maybe to save a little money and avoid the “extra hour” fee from your vendors, maybe because the natural light will be best a half hour earlier or later, maybe because your invitations have already been printed and sent out, or maybe just because. Either way, it’s a superstition and you will be sure to have a lovely lifetime of marriage together if you work hard at loving one another, communicating, and laughing at the silly things in life.
Getting married on an odd numbered day is bad luck (same goes for the 13ths, holidays, divorced parent’s anniversaries, etc.)
Ok, maybe you don’t want to get married on the same day as your now divorced parents, that’s understandable. But if you think your marriage will be doomed just because the only available Saturday in the upcoming year at the place you’ve been dying to get married at is on the 11th, then you may need to consider talking through some fears and emotions with a counselor or friend. The calendar wasn’t invented by evil sorcerers to be used as a scare tactic. Imagine where we’d be or how anything would get done these days if no one scheduled anything on odd days!
It is forbidden to see one another on your wedding day until the ceremony starts.
This is nothing more than a personal decision. If you truly believe that you’ll go to hell if you violate this tradition, then you probably shouldn’t do it. It’s ok to have beliefs and morals and values that are important to you – everyone should. It’s also ok to decide to see one another if that’s what feels right to you and your spouse. “First looks” may be all the rage these days compared to twenty years ago, but that’s also because we’re more open about our thoughts these days and not afraid to think twice about what truly matters to us. See previous post "4 Reasons to do a First Look" here for more on why this can be a beneficial moment on your wedding day.
So if you’re anxious about the big day and think you’d be comforted to have a few moments with your loved one who you’re about to pledge to spend the rest of your life with (who by the way, is also probably just as anxious as you are), then talk about this together, go over some options of how you might like to spend those moments together (maybe it involves breakfast together, maybe it just involves holding hands on either side of a door without actually seeing one another), and make sure you do what feels right for you.
Are there any other myths or alleged "traditions" that you've had a nice laugh at?